Saturday, July 31, 2004
went to watch the NDP preview jux now!!!
*woohoo* went there with pearlin. and tickets are courtesy of my dear da jie shiqi. she's doin the urshering job down there u noe! oh ya, sihui was there too! as
MOTIVATORS somemore!
*lolx* dance and dance in fronta huge crowd man! oh, its so so fun fer her i tell you! tis year's national day parade was great but seems to be abit short though. lasted fer only like the most 3hrs? but nvm about the time period, the dance part was super nice man! the dancers, together with all those sophiscated light settings and nice music came up with the best show of da day. it was definitely much more beta than last year's performance. its sort of more fairytale style, more romantic.
*winks* then there's the show, the fireworks display! oh man, they're so so nice and spectacular u bet! cant get enuff of them man.
*heez*
together, we build a better future for our nation.
anyway, my jie edelina was supposedly to go with me for the NDP preview, but then she couldnt get replacement fer her cartel work last minute. so, she missed the chance. but nvm, tink i'll be goin down to watch the actual NDP at stadium waterfront with her on aug 9th. jux cant resist the charms of da beautiful fireworks!
*lolx*
Friday, July 30, 2004
oh man, i noe i haven been blogging so often nowadays. sorry guys!
*sigh* school's been real stressing with all the projects reports and all da shit cramping my head like neva before! im goin crazy soon i bet!
*pulls hair*
im tired man. real tired. i need some rest.
jux give it to me.
When we laugh or we cry it's together
Through the rain and the stormiest weather
We gon still be as one it's forever, it's forever
Tuesday, July 27, 2004
Love is like a violin. The music may stop now and then, but the strings remain forever.
well, the above statement sounds like a fact to me, but then does the strings really remain on the violin forever? hard to say so. but for one thing, love isnt something tat can be ended with no strings attached. it means, even if you do break up with someone, you two would or could still be gd frens or maybe jux not as close as previous. ok, maybe tis theory doesnt applies to everybody, but at least to most of us right?
Love is when you take away the feeling, the passion, and the romance in a relationship- and find out you still care for that person.
take away tat much? doesnt it means tat love is an empty shell now? well, fortunately, nope. love is sth so special, sth you cant jux compare it to any other things else. its jux not the same alright. yep. to say, love without passion is hard. even harder is love without tat feeling. u noe wat i means yeah. but then, when even without the existence of all these factors, there is still the presence of care. wow. so touching isnt it? -touched- anyway, tis kinda fairy tale ending doesnt always happens. but mind you, i said 'doesnt always', so means tat there's still chances of it happening in real life okie! -winks-
sometimes when "A" and "B" breaks up with each other, it doesnt always mean tat they both dun love each other no more. maybe its jux for the gd of both sides. it could be "A" losing grip of her gd studying grades or "B" needs to further study overseas. either ways. but both are meant to be for the gd of each other right? yep. so, dont blame either side only for any break up, cos you're not in their situation, you duno really wat happen. cant decide for them. yep.
backpackers...
Sunday, July 25, 2004
suddenly i have tis thought to be a BACKPACKER. then i can travel to lotsa places and go everywhere i wanta go! sounds like a great idea yeah!? but if only my pocket allows it...
*sigh*
make peace, make the world better place
well, backpackers are all great pple in my eyes. with the exceptions of some bad apples of course. they're peace-loving pple, or so wat my tourism lecturer says. reason? simple as ABCs. they travels alot, to anywhere and everywhere arnd the world. they get to meet new pple, see new stuffs, do many new things tat they neva did before etc. and in the process of travelling and meeting, they get to understand more about the cultural and habits of others' and their countries. and they get to promote their very own country too! haha. sounds like walking advertisment boards yeah! haha. also, they more often than not like to exchange cultural values with the pple they met along their way. so, in this sense, they create sort of bonding between everybody and promote
ONE-EARTH, ONE-PEOPLE!!! regardless of religion, country or watever. this means
PEACE!!! peace on earth everyone! haha.
come and catch me if you can! :p
and u noe, backpackers lead a carefree life, or supposedly so. tat's wat many says. they seems to have so much money notes in their pockets tat they dun have to worry where to go and they jux keep travelling! haha. im toking rubbish i noe. ok, i shall stop tat. serious again zhutou! haha. lame. anyway, there's a gd and bad on backpacker/backpacking. ok, a backpacker travels alot and doesnt have any fixed destination, and wats important is, a backpacker doesnt stay for long! so, if you're looking for one, tat's bad. cos you'll have a hard time finding! and the
GOOD is when you're a backpacker yourself! cos the same thing applies and pple will have a super hard time locating you! haha. lame again. but its a brilliant recommendation to those who wana avoid their certain pple. right?!
*lolx*
destination in life, have you found yours?
well, so sad to say tat i've not found mine yet. maybe not even close to finding it. *sadded* and yes, i've heard of pple who travels to go in search of their own destination in life. these pple jux dunno wat they wan at tat moment and decided to travel while giving themselves time to find their own destination in life. while some succeeded in finding it, some dont. and oh some of these pathetic souls actually spent almost their entire life goin in search of their destination in life and yet up giving it all up in the end. reason? cos they tink they still haven found it and they wun be able to find it anyhow. but then, the actual truth is, some of them might have found it already. sounds irony to you? nvm. now my question is, why go so much trouble for the answer? look, you dun have to go anywhere to find your destination in life. the fact is tat the
DESTINATION you're forever looking for, is actually always all up in ya mind. and whether its where you wana go or wat you wana be, it's all up to you to decide. so why bothers so much to go look for it? pointless. but well, like i mentioned above, some of us may need time to help us think and decide. and maybe travelling arnd is the best option. cos as you get to see/hear/experience more, you'll learn more. and cos of tat, it'll help you to come up with a beta answer to yourself.
to each his own.
each of us has a different destination in life. some wants to be a lawyer in future, while for me, opps!, i still dunno wat i wan yet. but then again, so wat if you've found your destination todae? for god knows, you might jux change your mind the very next day! and its not so much about fickle-minded or wat nots. to say it simply, its jux how life goes. nothing stays on forever yeah. and change always happens. we'll jux have to accept tat.
:)
the saddest day on earth is the day when our FOREVER ends.
Friday, July 23, 2004
Which Ariel are you?
~ a quiz by Clear Black Lines ~
be strong...
somewhere, some place
you'll still find them floating around.
and i mean
MEMORIES in my above writing. dont you tink it's kinda torturing to have memories of the past haunting you every now and then? i mean those bad or beta-not-mention-it ones, of course. well, i would say it's kinda scary to a certain extend. im sure you've seen or heard stories about pple goin insane cos of those past memories or events tat's living in their mind and haunting them every second of their life. it's hell for these pple.
let's see it from an example: a dad accidentally got his boy killed due to his carelessness. he left him to play alone, the boy fell and hit his head on the metal structure of the playground and died eventually. whose fault? the dad's? well, maybe he has to shoulder part of the blame, but definitely not all of it. but still, he blamed himself for the tradegy, hated himself for being such a careless fool, sunk into a depression and started having all kinds of illusions. like wat? like whenever he sees a boy, he'll think tat's his son. and when he sees the boy's photo, he'll go crazy tat very moment cos he remembered how his son died due to his carelessness. omg...can you imagine all the sufferings he's goin thru? all the memories tat's haunting is doin him hell of guilt man. and wats all tat for actually? will all these bring back his son? no, it wont. sinking into a depression and getting himself stucked in the past wont do him any help or good. for all to know, he's doing the situation more worse than ever. by doing so, he lost his usual self, his normal life. and do you tink tat's wat the dead boy above in heaven wants to see? certainly not. not tat im trying to say he have to brainwash himself for the fatal incident, but at least move on in life right?! i mean yes he might find himself carrying some guilt for the rest of his life, but then im sure as he moves on, time will heal the pain and tat burden of guilt might not be as heavy as it first seems. anybody agrees with me? hah.
The feelings, what's inside
Broken hearts, and hard times
Don't let life break you down this time
move on...
Thursday, July 22, 2004
time to move on, let go
who says letting go something is tat easy? can you jux let go of something jux like tat? especially when tat something had once means alot to you. no, you cant. you jux cant talk youself into doin so.
I just keep holding on
But I'm not that strong
Without you
I just keep holding on
But I'm not that strong
Without you
It's certainly not an easy feat to let go, to forget, or even to throw something to the back of your mind permanently. pieces of those memories, be it sad or happy or even the bad ones, will still remain. it's difficult, or rather impossible to forget your past or sth with no strings attached. cos there bound to be stayovers. no doubt. like wat many pple said about memories, past events or watever you called it: you can try to forget them and keep them out of ya mind, but you definitely cant erase them totally or permanently. how cliche but true.
out of sight, out of mind
u noe pple always come up with tat sentence when they meet up with things or problems they dun wish to see or face. and i tink whoever came up with the sentence above did it without giving it thorough thoughts. ok, i have to admit tat to certain degree its applicable. but then, does getting something out of ya sight means getting it out of ya mind? nope, doesnt means so. well, at least to most pple out there. i must say sometimes it isnt those external stuffs out there which are visible to our naked eyes tat force us to rekindle the thoughts or misses in our mind, agree? at most times, its actually those little little memories tat's alive in our hearts and minds tat brings out all the thoughts and misses, bringing us back for a moment, to wat was
ONCE again.
it's ok tat you're gone now.
cos at the very least, i've still got the picture of you in my heart.
future...
Saturday, July 17, 2004
no one can foresee the future. only god knows wats installed for us. and i hope everything will turn out fine for me.
life is so full of unexpectancy.
i jux finished watching a ch8 show on a poly graduate suffering from a tragic and rare illness. tis illness sort of breaks down her immune system and causes her to lose most of her basic abilities such as talking, understanding and walking. to put it short, she's sort of a "vegetable" now. (no offence to the patient) and the worst is, there's almost no known cure for tis terrible illness. oh my, tis sounds truly heart-breaking, especially for her family members. according to the show, she's actually a poly graduate, an all-rounder, has talents for music and sports and stuffs, a lady who has a great future install for her. but then, tradegy strikes and it took away jux everything from her. why be so cruel? why did tis to her?
now tat she's seriously ill, she needs tenderous care and concern. her parents are taking turns to look after her on a 24/7 basis and even feeding her a meal is a tedious task tat'll takes hours to complete. her medical bills runs up to thousands and the whole family is depending on her sister, who's the sole provider for the family. how sad. imagine the pain the family members are bearing, and the heavy burden the sister will have to carry on behalf of the whole family. how tragic. now life for the family revolves around tis lady (i dunno the acutal name...so i shall call her "lady"). and life for them seems alot harder than before, or i would jux say life is definitely tough for them now. for parents to see their daughter suffering so much from the illness and yet unable to voice out her pains, it would be unbearable. and for her sister to see her own sister landing in such saddening state, a far description from wat she used to be last time, its melancholic.
you can predict, but you cant expect.
no one would expect tis to happen to her. no one. and no one wish to see things turn out tis way too. its a heart-wrenching to see it happening our society. life's jux been fixed tis way for her and there's no way things would change. its a hard truth to accept, we all noe tat. but then, wat else can we do? we cant turn back time and try to rewrite the history, and we cant possibly stop the tradegy from happening oso. but wat can do is to pray for her, in any way we could. and wish tat god would be a little kinder to her and family.
it doesnt matters what's gonna happen to me the next moment, as long as i've got YOU besides me.
i must say tat among all the misfortunes, tis lady is counted lucky. i mean at the very least, she's got full support from her family members, which is a heart-warming thing to know. when one falls ill, wat he/she needed most is care and concern from family members and most importantly their physical prescence, on top of any other things. try to understand the fact tat it takes lots of courage on the part of her family members to accept the hard and sudden truth, and it takes even more courage and determination to stay by her side and neva stop in finding a cure for her illness although doctors believed tat a full recovery for her would be nothing short of a miracle. also, believing in her and tat one fine day she'll recover from everything. so here, i would like to end my entry by giving a full salute to her family members and wat i wana say is tat you guys are great and i believe tat all your efforts will bloom fruitful results one day. may god bless the lady and tat she'll get well soon .
Thursday, July 15, 2004
Broken-By Seether Feat. Amy Lee
{Seether}
I wanted you to know
That I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph
And I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
{Both}
Because I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
{Seether}
You've gone away
You don't feel me here anymore
{Amy Lee}
The worst is over now
And we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high and steal my pain away {both- only the word away}
There's so much left to learn
And no one left to fight {Both}
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
{Both}
Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
Cause Im broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone
{Seether}
You're gone away
You don't feel me here anymore
never wait...
Wednesday, July 14, 2004
*sadded*
recently pple like to bully me. very sad. its out of my normal style.
*sigh*
you noe there are times whereby you couldnt really bring yourself to say out something to a certain someone. your mouth jux refuse to speak out wats on ya mind. it can be real frustrating at times. and the worst is, you might jux lost the chance to get it out of ya mind forever. sigh. so i suggest, speak out wats on ya mind, always. dun keep everything at the bottom of ya heart. its useless i tell you. and those little things you've kept there will jux bottled up and one fine day you might jux go
KAABOOM!!! get me?
i wanted to tell YOU very much how i really feel,
but i just couldnt find the courage to do so.
now that YOU're gone,
im crying all alone.
-zhutou-
though it sounds like a chicken feet task, its actually alot harder if you wana get it done. so i guess the saying "things are easier said than done" have its logic afterall.
*winks* i understand tat sometimes its really hard to let known or relate your feelings to others. its difficult to convey your so called 'internal messages' in ya mind to pple arnd you. afterall, pple wun get to see wats floating in ya mind. right?
but then, one advice. sometimes it jux takes some courage on ya part to get things going. so dun jux keep on waiting until eventually you missed the chance of getting your feelings conveyed to tat someone. tat's when you regret everything. and it's too late to turn back.
i want to avoid that circumstance whereby there's no second chance to tell YOU how I feel.
Tuesday, July 13, 2004
ok, im not sadded anymore. my dad says he'll increase my allowance by ABIT tis month. well, maybe not tat much of money. but then, at least it'll increase by ABIT. and tat ABIT is still money. haha. getting lame here.
*winks*
Vindicated
I am selfish
I am wrong
I am right
I swear I'm right
Swear I knew it all along
And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now
The things you swore you saw yourself
im feeling saddded.
someone dun want to add me in the friendster. *sobz*
and for your info, tat someone is ng siok zhi. sigh
but then, she's still looks fine to me. a nice fren to have. -smiles-
lifeless...
currently feeling confused. emptied. drained out of energy.
finally i realised... tat trying to bring out the usual smile on my face is definitely a much easier task as compared to me showing my pain in front of all.
put you and me side by side,
tat's what happiness means.
smile!
Monday, July 12, 2004
**to a dear brother of mine who has been so kind and patient with me all along despite the fact tat im such a naughty zhutou and kept keeping his blood pressure on a high degree. thanks for everything and remember, you were one of those who brought on my smile when im terribly down and out. so now its my turn to give you all the lights and hopes you need to bring on your smiles and laughters once again. *smiles*
laughing is never a chore, and it will never be.
they say laughing your hearts out is one great way to release the happiness steam in you, other than ways like jumping or screaming out loud in joy. which i tink if they happens to be quite overly done, eyes will begin to settle on you and maybe soon i'll have to visit you in the woodbridge.
*lolx* besides laughing, smiling too provides you a channel to display your happiness within. and as we noe, both smiling and laughing have incredible impacts on mankinds like you and me.
*eyes widen* its scientifically proven tat they're good exercises for health purposes. yeah its true, neva ever doubt tat awesome finding. they actually helps to slow down the ageing process of ya inner heart(you noe wat i means), and most importantly, its helps in the physical state also. as in they can prevent
WRINKLES and other ageing symptoms from flooding in all at one go. which i tink is a truly frightening event in case of it really happens! especially to ladies! hmmm...so, tat's how laughing/smiling bring us great advantages yeah. so let's see, my suggestion here is never fail to flash a smile even if you're in deep shit cos whether you've got the smile on your face or not, it doesnt matter much, you're still in the
DEEP SHIT! haha. ultra lame joke. there you go, you're smiling again while reading my previous sentence! hah.
never frown, cos you'll neva know who's falling in love with your beautiful smile.
anyway, everybody knows tat it takes less muscles to smile than to frown. so why frown in the first place? i do understand tat in certain periods of our life, we're so called forced to frown. i mean we dun have the mood to smile, so we jux do the opposite.
*sigh* i've experienced tat before also. during tat period, everything may seem so hopeless for us and we all have tis typical mindset tat
'all is over'. tat's why we frown. but come on', nothing in tis world is so big deal tat it can smash and end all our hopes. right? there's certainly hope among the thick mist you're facing, its jux tat
time is needed to search for them. agree?
all hopes died on the day your heart gave up searching for them. -zhutou-
when you're facing a crisis, a failure, or even relationship problems, always remember to smile. look, im not trying to force a smile on you or watever. i noe its hard during tis kinda times. but think, keeping a charcoal-like face on you doesnt helps in any way either. so why not smile? and try to access the matter or crisis in a more optimistic way. let me provide you with an example: i might have got my wallet stolen by some pricks but found it later on in a rubbish bin with all my cash gone.
*sadded* but at least, i got my wallet back right? remember, cash are nothing but some external materials. your IC and other identification cards are the real important issues. so you see, every situation can be seen in a good way. yours too. i can bet on tat.
*winks*
YOU wont get to taste the beauty of life until you've learn to appreciate every failure tat comes by as golden opportunities to mould a better YOU.
Friday, July 09, 2004
school started at 11am today (thurs). anyway, teacher let us off super early and we ended up having 3hrs break again! wah phiang...teacher shld have inform us earlier mah...shld have jux stay at home and sleep! somemore the weather super comfortable!
("-_-) oh ya, weiliang overslept so he didnt joined me and cecilia for our first lesson, he joined us fer those later on lectures. so, me and cecilia joined xiusi and company to jurong point fer lunch. addy came down to meet us too!
-smiles- had crystal jade. the food's not bad but then the serving's abit too big. so all of us ended up pushing all the food to addy! poor addy. haha.
-winks- we played arcade and took neoprints! very fun. the huiwen horz, VERY NICE AND GOOD AND FUNNY.
-lolx- she PUT A
FIRE ICON on top of my FACE!!! haha. nvm, i put a
BOMB on top of her face oso! haha. had lots of fun and laughter. too bad weiliang couldnt join us, if not, it would more more fun!
:)
And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby
Thursday, July 08, 2004
Xiu Si mentioned on her blog tat i called her
"emergency" today. haha.
it's a long and ultra
lame story. shall not elaborate on it. i dun wana take the risk of being roasted alive by pple!
-help!- haha.
shhh...shall jux keep it as an inside joke.
-winks-
Xiu Si...
EMERGENCY!!!
-lolx- ("-_-)
choices...
Tuesday, July 06, 2004
updates
alright, the new school terms starts officially for us SP students on 5th of july. got into a tourism class like i mentioned in the previous entry. but the study atmosphere certainly not here yet. i jux couldnt find the, if not any motivation tat makes me wana go school and study. anyway, my new classamates are a fine bunch. quite fine.
many things are not within our control.
for those we have, we wish we wouldnt mess it all up.
life is made up of choices. tat's true. but then again, do we miss out some parts or fine details or watever? did we ever mention or even came to realise tat in reality, we dun have tat much choices to choose from actually? we didnt choose to born in singapore, God sent us here. we didnt get to choose the primary school we studied in
P1, our parents did tat. we didnt wish to study at all, or rather most of us hate studying in fact. but still we're being sent to school and told to study hard. and we did jux tat. tat's not our choice for the most of us, agree? anyway, im not trying to sound as if i hate studying or wat nots, rather im jux trying to emphasise tat not everything in life is within our control. sad but true, most things arent within our control. sigh.
we cant do what we want, but at least do what we can. -zhutou-
sometimes we regret making the wrong choice, wished we had chosen the other way out instead. sometimes we werent given any choices, a sad case lah. and sometimes we wished we werent given any choices to choose from instead, cos making choices is a super duper tough decision process. you jux dunno which to choose and which to forgo, so it's hard on the mind yeah.
*stressed* but say again, making a wrong choice or decision might not be a tat dreadful thing after all. though in certain cases, making a wrong move/decision/choice can bring you disaster. things like deciding to kill a person or not and so on. these are the only exceptions. for wat everyone knows,
every choice will lead you somewhere. it's jux a difference in the destination, or maybe throw in the types of roads you'll be trudging on too. but remember, there's no easy way out in life, so i guess it doesnt matters much which choice or road you choose to ride on, cos you'll sure be encountering the ups and downs pre-planned for everyone else on earth, with the exception tat the ups and downs may varies for each individuals. so to conclude, i'll say all choices are meant to be good. and even if it looks bad in ur case, fret not. cos most probably you'll earned a valuable lesson from it and thus helping you to make better choices next time round.
-smiles-
if you were given another chance to choose, would you stick to your previous decision? or would you consider the other options instead?
happy belated birthday weiliang!
Thursday, July 01, 2004
happy happy belated 18th birthday to you weiliang...
jux came back from weiliang's bade chalet. fun. lotsa fun. lots of laughters too. our dear bdae boy weiliang staged his very own mini concert at the chalet itself!
-woohoo- cheers for him everybody!
-lolx- and not forgetting the food's uber nice and delicious too! hey all self-marinated one ok!
*proud* haha. anyway, lots of pics are up! including weiliang's bade chalet pics. more coming right up!
-winks-
sometimes its in the mind that you fail.
nothing is forever
ok pple, i've gotten the results of my postings. finally.
-phew!- am posted into my desired option, which is the
tourism option. but well, most of my classmates got into the supply chain management option and yes, they all got into the same class. sigh. sort of sad yeah. but neva mind the case, cos i too got weiliang and cecilia in my class too!
-smiles- the supply chain group consists of winnie lee and charlene lee from the
LEE DAGGER family, bro kangming, puisan and janice (my alliance). so far so good. and oh ya, the retail family sounds fun too! hmm...let's see ah, pple like joy, angela, denise, jiafang and ali.
-woohoo- all of us seems quite evenly spread out yeah. but still, betcha all of us will still miss those old days. hah.
-winks-
anyway, some of us got into options which we didnt want to get into. tats always the case isnt it? sounds abit sad but its all decided and nothing really will change the plan rite?! and on top of tat, this kinda things always happens. so, i suggest let's jux try to move on and learn to appreciate more about the options given to us. for whether you like it or not, you still got to study it. to put it simply, we've got no choice.
("-_-)
the things we do in the future will most probably be a mast difference from what we're doing now.
nothing stays on forever, so says many. and i agree wit it totally. so wat if you've gotten a choice you dislike or maybe had the least interest in?! wats so sad or bad about tat?! honestly speaking, you may not like the idea back then or even at the present, but you cant guarantee tat you wun come to like it in the future. right? its jux like how some pple detest the king of fruit
"durian" cos they tink it smells like
shit and had the initial stubborn mindset tat it must taste like
shit oso. wat rubbish! but then when they were forced to try it out finally, guess wat?! they fell in love wit it almost immediately! hah. sounds funny.
-lolx- but its something tat always happens. hah.
the usefulness of something usually depends on your willingness to learn, use and appreciate.
maybe some might argued tat the choice they've got will do them no good in future, cos its not their chosen choice or they jux judge its usefulness solely based on their own opinions. their side of views i mean here. but face it guys, if the watever choice you've got isnt good or anything useful, why would the school have such options or studies in the very first place?! think. think hard.
nothing is useless. everything you learn in school will help you some way or another in years to go.
you cant judge a book by the cover.
you need to explore it before having any real comments.
